My father is finally home, and he is very thankful to be here. Even with a long road to recovery ahead, everything seems better from your own room in your own house. I myself find it difficult to be away from my own home for so long, even though I haven't been through near the difficulties that my father has been through in the past few weeks. I miss my husband most of all, and can't imagine life without him. I understand why it scared my mom so much at the thought of losing my dad. When you've found the one person who you can't live without, the idea of that happening is devastating in an indescribable way.
While sitting at the hospital last week my mom and I were discussing the way tragedy brings people together (in much the same way as a pregnant belly elicits pregnancy stories). I heard so many stories while sitting in the waiting room of the hospital. One mother told me about her 23 year old soon who had just been diagnosed 4 weeks earlier with cancer. Amazing the way life changes so quickly for people. He will have months of recovery and was suddenly faced with things that would've never entered my immature mind at the unseasoned age of 23. How horrible that people must go through these things. Still, I find it immensely interesting that even the most reserved people are willing to divulge their deepest heartaches because they see you in similar circumstances. Though they are undesirable places to be, the circumstances almost invite you to share them. To let people know others understand what they're going through. They feel the deepest empathy, and even though they may not know the special person in your life that it effects, they are sitting there going through it with you.
If we really want to be Christ like, or even just a good person, I think that empathy deserves more than a passing thought. Though it may be a dark place to remember in your life, it is also something that you can tell others about to strengthen them. It may be your tragedy, but in the end, its God's victory.
Finally, all of you be like-minded, showing fellow feeling, having brotherly affection, tenderly compassionate, humble in mind... bestowing a blessing, because you were called to this [course], so that YOU might inherit a blessing. I Peter 3: 8,9.
Monday, August 8, 2011
Wednesday, August 3, 2011
Working Together for Our Good
I have been way out of the social network loop due to an Evidence final and the long (13 hour) drive up north, that left me more jet-lagged than any plane trip (and a one year old more off schedule than he has ever been). Anyway, so enough of my excuses... Here's the update on dad...
We have been through a lot of ups and downs in the past week. The good news is that he is healing from surgery very, very well. In fact, if it was up to the cancer doctors, he would have went home last Saturday. Of course, there are always grander schemes to things than what we know. After some irregularities on his heart monitor they kept him for more observation, finally determining that they should do some serious investigation. That investigation revealed that there has been at some point in time serious damage to the left portion of his heart. I now know way more about how the heart works than I did before, but since I'm sure you don't care, I will spare you the details. Anyway, needless to say, this isn't good. Dad has not taken any of this very well due to the fact that the doctors were being very slow about providing answers. We have been given the serious run around, and lots of different opinions, but as it stands they are weighing different procedural options, the paramount factor being how far it will put off radiation treatment based on recovery time.
The truly crazy thing? The doctor thought his heart sounded great a few weeks ago, but this damage is far older than that. AND if they would have known about the damage, they likely would never have done the surgery on his tongue because it would have been too high risk. That cancer that we now know was in the last stage possible, would have been ultimately untreatable by any earthly means. God may seem to work in mysterious ways, but He definitely knew what He was doing.
My brother went with me tonight, thinking we were going to have to convince my dad to stay in the hospital (he was ready to leave!). It was the first time he had been there to see dad... It amazing how tragedy brings family together. My family and I don't normally talk a lot, not because we don't love each other or because we're upset... We are just that way. Its also funny how you think about how we may so seldom talk to God except when tragedy strikes. Not because we're upset or don't care, but just because you get busy with day to day life and there may seem like a million other things to do. Thankfully, just like family, God is always there to listen. Let us not forget to thank God in the good times and the bad. Just as we should remember to tell those we love how we feel as often as possible. You can never tell when that one time is the last time.
And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. Romans 8:28.
We have been through a lot of ups and downs in the past week. The good news is that he is healing from surgery very, very well. In fact, if it was up to the cancer doctors, he would have went home last Saturday. Of course, there are always grander schemes to things than what we know. After some irregularities on his heart monitor they kept him for more observation, finally determining that they should do some serious investigation. That investigation revealed that there has been at some point in time serious damage to the left portion of his heart. I now know way more about how the heart works than I did before, but since I'm sure you don't care, I will spare you the details. Anyway, needless to say, this isn't good. Dad has not taken any of this very well due to the fact that the doctors were being very slow about providing answers. We have been given the serious run around, and lots of different opinions, but as it stands they are weighing different procedural options, the paramount factor being how far it will put off radiation treatment based on recovery time.
The truly crazy thing? The doctor thought his heart sounded great a few weeks ago, but this damage is far older than that. AND if they would have known about the damage, they likely would never have done the surgery on his tongue because it would have been too high risk. That cancer that we now know was in the last stage possible, would have been ultimately untreatable by any earthly means. God may seem to work in mysterious ways, but He definitely knew what He was doing.
My brother went with me tonight, thinking we were going to have to convince my dad to stay in the hospital (he was ready to leave!). It was the first time he had been there to see dad... It amazing how tragedy brings family together. My family and I don't normally talk a lot, not because we don't love each other or because we're upset... We are just that way. Its also funny how you think about how we may so seldom talk to God except when tragedy strikes. Not because we're upset or don't care, but just because you get busy with day to day life and there may seem like a million other things to do. Thankfully, just like family, God is always there to listen. Let us not forget to thank God in the good times and the bad. Just as we should remember to tell those we love how we feel as often as possible. You can never tell when that one time is the last time.
And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. Romans 8:28.
Sunday, July 24, 2011
An Unchanging God
I was thinking today about the many changes we go through in our lives, as I think about my father's changing condition. He's doing pretty well now, but gave us a bit of a scare this morning (he was having trouble breathing). Other than that, he's doing pretty well, other than a few minor complications that are pretty normal after a long surgery coupled with inactivity. Anyway, his condition is constantly changing just as we are always changing (even though we may not always change the way we'd like, or more accurately the way our spouses would like us to;)).
My final thought was that, even though we are forever in motion and constant change, God never changes. Its amazing to me that through the thousands of years that humans have been in existence God has never changed one time. Thinking about this is really comforting when you think about our lives in relationship to the Bible. I have quoted a lot of scripture in the past few weeks to reassure my foundation in God's word and affirm his faithfulness and unchanging nature.
Being in law school, and reading about a billion cases, I have watched how the law has evolved over time. If you get the wrong case and quote it to the judge as the basis for your case, you lose. Its as simple as that. How wonderful is it that God's word is not that way... We don't have to worry about when we bring our case to God that we are using the wrong argument, an old law that has somehow become archaic. Nope, we just need one book. Even in some cases, one scripture to plead our case before God. I've felt the many prayers and petitions that have went up before God in the past few weeks for my Dad. I'm so thankful to know that so many of my friends and family know how to pray, know the word, and an unchanging God.
Hebrews 13:8 Jesus Christ the same yesterday, and to day, and for ever.
My final thought was that, even though we are forever in motion and constant change, God never changes. Its amazing to me that through the thousands of years that humans have been in existence God has never changed one time. Thinking about this is really comforting when you think about our lives in relationship to the Bible. I have quoted a lot of scripture in the past few weeks to reassure my foundation in God's word and affirm his faithfulness and unchanging nature.
Being in law school, and reading about a billion cases, I have watched how the law has evolved over time. If you get the wrong case and quote it to the judge as the basis for your case, you lose. Its as simple as that. How wonderful is it that God's word is not that way... We don't have to worry about when we bring our case to God that we are using the wrong argument, an old law that has somehow become archaic. Nope, we just need one book. Even in some cases, one scripture to plead our case before God. I've felt the many prayers and petitions that have went up before God in the past few weeks for my Dad. I'm so thankful to know that so many of my friends and family know how to pray, know the word, and an unchanging God.
Hebrews 13:8 Jesus Christ the same yesterday, and to day, and for ever.
Friday, July 22, 2011
For He Hath Done Great Things
As many of you already know... My father is out of surgery and doing well. He's still in recovery, but in a private room and not ICU like we had anticipated. There was NO cancer in his jaw. None. What was present in his mouth was able to be COMPLETELY removed. God is faithful. God is good. Blessed be the name of the Lord!
I can't stress enough that even though by dad still had to go under the knife, and even though we don't know why God didn't heal him before that, that there IS a reason. Its no coincidence that there was no cancer found in other areas where it was thought to be. There's a reason for everything, and all we should be concerned about now is praising God for what He has done and what He will continue to do. Your prayers as my father recovers are still very much appreciated. There is a long road ahead of us still with chemo and radiation in his near future. My dad's a tough guy, but this is trying on anyone's body and soul. For those of you in the Columbus area, he will be in the hospital for at least a week if you'd like to visit in a few days. My mom is already tired and I would ask you to continue to lift her up in prayer along with the rest of the family. This has been very stressful, and that will not go away any time soon. My dad still will have to learn to talk and swallow again, which is going to be trying time. I will also be in Ohio next week for those of my friends who are wondering... I will be staying until year two of law school commences in mid-August.
Thanks again everyone for your prayers!!! We are forever in your debt for the love and support that each of you have given us. We continue to be appreciative of what I know you will continue to give. Many, many thanks!
For the Mighty One has done great things for me--holy is his name. Luke 1: 49.
I can't stress enough that even though by dad still had to go under the knife, and even though we don't know why God didn't heal him before that, that there IS a reason. Its no coincidence that there was no cancer found in other areas where it was thought to be. There's a reason for everything, and all we should be concerned about now is praising God for what He has done and what He will continue to do. Your prayers as my father recovers are still very much appreciated. There is a long road ahead of us still with chemo and radiation in his near future. My dad's a tough guy, but this is trying on anyone's body and soul. For those of you in the Columbus area, he will be in the hospital for at least a week if you'd like to visit in a few days. My mom is already tired and I would ask you to continue to lift her up in prayer along with the rest of the family. This has been very stressful, and that will not go away any time soon. My dad still will have to learn to talk and swallow again, which is going to be trying time. I will also be in Ohio next week for those of my friends who are wondering... I will be staying until year two of law school commences in mid-August.
Thanks again everyone for your prayers!!! We are forever in your debt for the love and support that each of you have given us. We continue to be appreciative of what I know you will continue to give. Many, many thanks!
For the Mighty One has done great things for me--holy is his name. Luke 1: 49.
Who Are You Praying For?
This will most likely be a double blog posting day (is that an appropriate use of the work blog? see... I'm new to this). Anyway, I just want everyone to know my dad got into surgery a little late this morning, but so far that's all that we know. I just thought I'd take the opportunity for those of you who don't know my dad, but have been gracious enough to pray for him, to let you know exactly who it is that you're praying for.
Since I was a small child, my dad has been invincible. He was the one person who was never "wrong" about anything, and I don't recall him being wrong about anything (factual or otherwise) until I was about 14 years old... and then, it was something trivial that really didn't matter. Not only was he intellectually invincible, I was pretty convinced that no one could take him down physically either (I once told all the boys at church camp that if any of them could take down my dad I would date them... it certainly did not happen, and though he's weakened right now, I'm pretty sure under normal conditions my husband probably couldn't either;)).
Even though my own perceptions may be biased, I can tell you a few things that aren't. My dad, growing up and since then as far as I know has NEVER drank, NEVER smoked, and NEVER let a cuss word cross his lips. It seems ironic then that his tongue would be where cancer decided to take root. The old cliche that bad things happen to good people doesn't seems to provide any comfort in this situation. Though it seems terribly unfair, my dad took it in stride and has been as classy as ever since finding out the news.
He's also been a caring husband and father. Though we've all done things that disappoint him, he takes every opportunity to tell me he's proud of me. He told my mom that he would've rather had 30 good years with her than 100 years with someone else. I'm sure he told my brother something similar.
So now you know about my dad as a person, what's left to tell you is what a powerful christian he is. He has put secular careers on the backburner multiple times in my life to pastor churches. Even now, he's responsible for two churches in Ohio, and that was his greatest concern upon finding out about his cancer. Not only that, but mom and dad took care of the Ohio church campgrounds for our church organization for a number of years. He touched the lives of many children and young adults, as well as other adults, while working there all summer long.
Though it may sometimes seem like the things we do go unnoticed, people notice when it counts. Everyone has come out in scores to pray for my dad and my entire family. People have been so supportive, and one pastor even paid for their hotel rooms for the next few nights after dad's surgery. The love and outpouring of generosity and faith are just unbelievable to me, and shows how faithful God is to people who work their whole lives to be faithful to him. My father is a much better person than I will ever be... and though its hard to understand right now why he's going through all of this, in the end just like every other step in his life, I know that God will be glorified in the end.
I have not concealed Your righteousness within my heart; I have proclaimed Your faithfulness and Your salvation. I have not hid away Your steadfast love and Your truth from the great assembly. Psalms 40:10. Yet the Lord is faithful, and He will strengthen [you] and set you on a firm foundation and guard you from the evil [one]. 2 Thessalonians 3:3.
ps-as I wrote this, my mom text me to let me know that they were just updated that things are going well. "God is good... all the time. All the time... God is good." -Greg Hord.
Since I was a small child, my dad has been invincible. He was the one person who was never "wrong" about anything, and I don't recall him being wrong about anything (factual or otherwise) until I was about 14 years old... and then, it was something trivial that really didn't matter. Not only was he intellectually invincible, I was pretty convinced that no one could take him down physically either (I once told all the boys at church camp that if any of them could take down my dad I would date them... it certainly did not happen, and though he's weakened right now, I'm pretty sure under normal conditions my husband probably couldn't either;)).
Even though my own perceptions may be biased, I can tell you a few things that aren't. My dad, growing up and since then as far as I know has NEVER drank, NEVER smoked, and NEVER let a cuss word cross his lips. It seems ironic then that his tongue would be where cancer decided to take root. The old cliche that bad things happen to good people doesn't seems to provide any comfort in this situation. Though it seems terribly unfair, my dad took it in stride and has been as classy as ever since finding out the news.
He's also been a caring husband and father. Though we've all done things that disappoint him, he takes every opportunity to tell me he's proud of me. He told my mom that he would've rather had 30 good years with her than 100 years with someone else. I'm sure he told my brother something similar.
So now you know about my dad as a person, what's left to tell you is what a powerful christian he is. He has put secular careers on the backburner multiple times in my life to pastor churches. Even now, he's responsible for two churches in Ohio, and that was his greatest concern upon finding out about his cancer. Not only that, but mom and dad took care of the Ohio church campgrounds for our church organization for a number of years. He touched the lives of many children and young adults, as well as other adults, while working there all summer long.
Though it may sometimes seem like the things we do go unnoticed, people notice when it counts. Everyone has come out in scores to pray for my dad and my entire family. People have been so supportive, and one pastor even paid for their hotel rooms for the next few nights after dad's surgery. The love and outpouring of generosity and faith are just unbelievable to me, and shows how faithful God is to people who work their whole lives to be faithful to him. My father is a much better person than I will ever be... and though its hard to understand right now why he's going through all of this, in the end just like every other step in his life, I know that God will be glorified in the end.
I have not concealed Your righteousness within my heart; I have proclaimed Your faithfulness and Your salvation. I have not hid away Your steadfast love and Your truth from the great assembly. Psalms 40:10. Yet the Lord is faithful, and He will strengthen [you] and set you on a firm foundation and guard you from the evil [one]. 2 Thessalonians 3:3.
ps-as I wrote this, my mom text me to let me know that they were just updated that things are going well. "God is good... all the time. All the time... God is good." -Greg Hord.
Thursday, July 21, 2011
You are Not Alone
I am so astonished at that outpouring of love and support that my family has received since finding out about my dad's cancer a little over a week ago. Tonight my dear friend Jacqueline text me to let me know that awesome prayer had taken place at Ohio camp for my dad... earlier this week, a friend of the family also called my dad on his cell phone so prayer could take place for him. These people are truly what keep us going... Many facebook posts, emails, text messages, and phone calls have been received by all the members of our family, and that keeps us encouraged.
Dad's surgery is scheduled for tomorrow at 7 am. My poor parents have to be there at 5 am to get ready for the operation. Aunt Carolyn said that she is still believing the surgery won't happen, that God is able to perform a miracle. I believe that too.
Three of my young cousins cut off all their hair in support of my dad... I thought that was so touching too. All these people with so much love, so much faith, and so much understanding have allowed me to see a different view of the world. It may seem like you are all alone, and even the people you care about and who care about you are far, far away, but in the tough times the miles don't matter. People reach out to you across the distance. God does this too. Just when we feel like there's no moving forward, and there's no way we can carry on, God reaches across the abyss to offer the strength and love we need to carry on. You are never alone. Dad won't be alone tomorrow either, and that's the source of my comfort. We thank you again for your prayers tomorrow!
I am with you always, even unto the end of the world. Matthew 28:20. Behold, I have graven thee upon the palms of my hands. Isaiah 49:16.
Dad's surgery is scheduled for tomorrow at 7 am. My poor parents have to be there at 5 am to get ready for the operation. Aunt Carolyn said that she is still believing the surgery won't happen, that God is able to perform a miracle. I believe that too.
Three of my young cousins cut off all their hair in support of my dad... I thought that was so touching too. All these people with so much love, so much faith, and so much understanding have allowed me to see a different view of the world. It may seem like you are all alone, and even the people you care about and who care about you are far, far away, but in the tough times the miles don't matter. People reach out to you across the distance. God does this too. Just when we feel like there's no moving forward, and there's no way we can carry on, God reaches across the abyss to offer the strength and love we need to carry on. You are never alone. Dad won't be alone tomorrow either, and that's the source of my comfort. We thank you again for your prayers tomorrow!
I am with you always, even unto the end of the world. Matthew 28:20. Behold, I have graven thee upon the palms of my hands. Isaiah 49:16.
Wednesday, July 20, 2011
Laughter is the Best Medicine
I was happy to know my dad could laugh about my "joke" about the house falling on my brother and I. I've always had a very dry sense of humor, just like his. I've always tried to avoid it, but I've embraced it over the past few years. To say the least, its unique. My dad told my mom today, after needing to unbutton his shirt for an EKG, that she better hold herself back from his new 15 pound lighter physique and stylin' haircut. I got a good laugh out of that myself. With every new entry of someone into the room (and apparently there were many doctors and nurses) he asked "where's the pizza?"
The truly sad part about this tragedy is that my dad should be sitting across the kitchen table from me right now... probably in a good rousing debate about why I think all the Republican candidates for president are lame, or why the lousy politicians in Washington can't seem to figure out this debt ceiling mess. He shouldn't have had to spend all day at the hospital undergoing tests. Unfair, yes. I know life isn't fair. You needn't remind me... I'm reminded every time my mom sends me a text message.
At least the tests today yielded positive results (or as positive as they could hold short of complete healing). My dad is pretty healthy overall (minus that rapidly growing tumor on his tongue), and he has lungs that sound "healthy." No cancer there, and we are praising God for that! The doctors have said that a plethora of things could have caused the cancer to begin with, and in addition, all the vitamins my dad takes as a result of his diabetes could have aided in the growth of the cancer (crazy, right?... vitamins, bad?). The thing is, seems like cancer is everywhere these days. Anything can cause cancer it seems like, and maybe that's why there are so many people who feel affected by this whole thing going on with my Dad. Truthfully, I always tried to empathize with what others were going through, but you can't understand it. Not really. Not until you've been there yourself. Hence, this blog. We understand... my mom, me, my brother, and all the other people around us who love my dad. We've been there, and we're going to make it through this together, with laughter and love.
The truly sad part about this tragedy is that my dad should be sitting across the kitchen table from me right now... probably in a good rousing debate about why I think all the Republican candidates for president are lame, or why the lousy politicians in Washington can't seem to figure out this debt ceiling mess. He shouldn't have had to spend all day at the hospital undergoing tests. Unfair, yes. I know life isn't fair. You needn't remind me... I'm reminded every time my mom sends me a text message.
At least the tests today yielded positive results (or as positive as they could hold short of complete healing). My dad is pretty healthy overall (minus that rapidly growing tumor on his tongue), and he has lungs that sound "healthy." No cancer there, and we are praising God for that! The doctors have said that a plethora of things could have caused the cancer to begin with, and in addition, all the vitamins my dad takes as a result of his diabetes could have aided in the growth of the cancer (crazy, right?... vitamins, bad?). The thing is, seems like cancer is everywhere these days. Anything can cause cancer it seems like, and maybe that's why there are so many people who feel affected by this whole thing going on with my Dad. Truthfully, I always tried to empathize with what others were going through, but you can't understand it. Not really. Not until you've been there yourself. Hence, this blog. We understand... my mom, me, my brother, and all the other people around us who love my dad. We've been there, and we're going to make it through this together, with laughter and love.
Then was our mouth filled with laughter, and our tongue with singing... The LORD hath done great things for them. Psalm 126:2.
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